The War is Over: CRM Changes Acronym to CRMsCRMCCRMSRMCESCCMCRM 2.0

The War is Over: CRM Changes Acronym to CRMsCRMCCRMSRMCESCCMCRM 2.0

Versailles, April 1, 2009 -- Customer Relationship Management (CRM) officially changed its name to CRMsCRMCCRMSRMCESCCMCRM 2.0 after an acrimonious war among the different factions in the industry was settled at peace talks at Versailles that ended today. The Treaty of Versailles For CRM Peace & Harmony (TTOVFCRMPH) was hailed by the participants as a "landmark document that would settle the discussion in CRM for a long time to come." (LDTWSTDICRMFALTTC). The long time was estimated to be three to five weeks.

The war, which lasted 3 years, was bitterly fought, with thousands of customers and several companies destroyed along the way.

What was surprising to most analysts was the number of factions that emerged during the bloody conflict. It began somewhat innocuously, though gruesomely, with a gang war in San Francisco between the Social CRM Mavens and the CRM 2.0 Pundits over who owned the hood, sometimes called "The Nomenclatura," by mostly clueless people (MCPs). However, it quickly escalated to a breakdown of customer-driven civilization with factions supporting Collaborative Customer Relationship Management (CCRM), Collaborative Customer Management (CCM), Social Relationship Management (SRM), Customer Engagement Strategy (CES) and Social Business (SB) joining the fray. Alliances among the contending forces were short-lived as the War to End All CRM Acronyms (WEACRMA) raged; pundit-led wikis and blogs sprung up overnight and recruited the citizenry to answer one invasion after another as every faction fought for the high ground, though none ultimately were able to seize it.

Finally, cooler heads prevailed (CHP) and a conference on peace (COP) was convened last month in Versailles to hammer out an agreement (HOA) and get back to engaging the customer-centered ecosystem (CCE), rather than each other in this senseless struggle (SS). The terms of the TTOVFCRMPH were as follows:

1. All names were to be combined into a single acronym (ANWTBCIASA).
2. All names were to be combined into a single acronym (ANWTBCIASA).
3. All names were to be combined into a single acronym (ANWTBCIASA).
4. ANWTBCIASA
5. Finally, each faction would retain the rights to its piece of the acronym.

"While not a perfect settlement, this is a great start to the end of acronyms and turf battles in CRM," said one factional leader. "We now have the opportunity to get back and build up this great industry and do what we really do best. I'll leave it to you to figure out what that is. I'm not exactly sure at this moment"

Thus,TCE, PHBR.

Glossary:

TCE= the conflict ended

PHBR= peace has been restored

BTW, April Fools!!!

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Comments

[Sales Management Strategy]

The title itself said everything. However,it's a great post with great description to make all believe that CRM has been changed to some CRMsCRMCCRMSRMCESCCMCRM 2.0...

[runescape gold]

I recently came accross your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I don’t know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.

[Chris Bucholtz]

In a similar vein, the U.K. newspaper The Guardian will now be published exclusively on Twitter: http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2009/apr/01/guardian-twitter-media-technology.

(I though "PHBR" in the context of CRM usually stood for "Price Has Been Raised." What do I know!)

[stevesancarlos]

Paco--I'll take your post over the crapola that Slideshare pulled ANY DAY. Hope all is well. How 'bout them Red Sox? -- stevesancarlos

[cnielsen]

You forgot the CRBM for "Customer Relationship Business Management" group. Us infoathander's should not feel left out. Other than that it seems to have a nice straight forward right off the tongue roll to it. Though I would hate to get into one of those "say it ten time fast contests".

[Hari Saravanan]

Thank God... :)

[@lex]

Too sad PCMCIA!